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10 thoughts on “Holidays on Ice

  1. says:

    I feel weird reviewing this book right now because the honest truth is I really genuinely did not like it And yet I’ve been called out recently by a bunch of helpful strangers on Goodreads for not liking their favorite books—this asshole telling me I should avoid all literary fiction this one here saying that my problem is with fiction in general—and I fear I’m going to develop a reputation for hating books and then Otis will kick me off Goodreads and all the mean girls in the Feedback Group will cheer and the only people who will care are the one hundred sixty four people in my friends list but then a huge chunk of those people are real life friends who have only ever logged into Goodreads once so in the end there are about five people who will care Maybe sixAnd that’s not to mention some of these other pressing fears a reviewer has to deal with what if I rate too many books lowly will people think I’m just trying to stir the pot and call negative attention to myself? or what if I rate too many books highly will people think I’m indiscriminate about which books are my favorites and therefore consider me unreliable? I suppose there’s also the potential for too many mediocre reviews and I guess that’s the guy whom everybody thinks can’t make up his freaking mindIn the end I’m going to just opt for honesty I disliked this David Sedaris book I have never read a David Sedaris book before but I understand him to be a very popular comedian and I usually enjoy very popular comedians Except this book isn’t funny The initial story around which the entire collection is based “SantaLand Diaries” is about Sedaris’s stint as a Christmas elf at a Macy’s department store The observations of his boss of the other elves of parents and children waiting to see Santa and of the other shoppers are pretty standard fare—there is nothing particularly noteworthy about his comments that made me laugh or even raise an eyebrow in amusement Of his other stories there is really only one that is mildly memorable; the rest rely heavily on shock value which is not something that can successfully stand on its own in my opinion Having said that I don’t know that I will give up on Sedaris altogether This book seems sort of thrown together most of the stories not relating to anything in particular whether to each other or to any unified theme but I would expect some of his other collections to have better focus and I will retain his other books in my “to read” list based on that expectation


  2. says:

    To the tune of “Frosty the Snowman”Da vid Se darisWas a writer oh so drollWith a uirky style and take on lifeThat will put you on the floorDa vid Se darisWrites the weirdest stuff you’ll seeAbout the Christmas whore and the Macy’s elvesAnd deathly children’s pageantryThere must have been some crazyIn the Sedaris family tree‘Cause David ain’t the only oneHave you seen his sister Amy?Oh Da vid Se darisCan your stories all be true?It matters not when you write as hotAs in Holidays on Ice


  3. says:

    After reading the first short story I thought this was going to be a delightful book SantaLand Diaries after all had me rolling down the isle of the plane on which I was reading it Okay I was just giggling constantly with freuent bursts of loud laugher interspersed No rolling but still very humiliating on the whole At any rate I came home in a dither to read the other stories as well Ugh Appalling Not a single chuckle among them Worse they were gross often offensive and I don't get offended and even horrific at times It was beyond black humor to just being black dark dismal disgusting No humor there I was most sincerely disappointed The only other story that had even the slightest bit of resonance was Dinah The Christmas Whore and that was likely because it was also written from a personal experience Sedaris in this girl's opinion should stay very far away from writing fiction Can you say smug? That's what I kept feeling about the author when suffering through the fiction stories I gave this two stars only for Santaland Diaries otherwise it'd be a solid one for lack of a worse ranking


  4. says:

    25 to 3 stars rounded up to 3 on the official rating to give Sedaris the benefit of the doubt I did not enjoy this uite as much as previous Sedaris titles I have read While it contained the cynicism I have come to expect from him it seemed to overpower the humor a lot than usual So instead of being amused I was left feeling uncomfortable Also since this is a much shorter compilation of holiday related stories it did not have the full satisfaction of one of his full length books with all original material Note I say holiday related in the previous sentence but there is one story in here about cadavers that I was not uite sure how it related to holidaysIf you are a die hard Sedaris fan check it out If you are just starting with Sedaris there are much better places to begin When You Are Engulfed in Flames Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim


  5. says:

    Find all of my reviews at you follow my reading you’re probably wondering what the hell could have happened to make me rate a Sedaris selection less than every Star Well lemma tell ya Although I was aware that this is a collection of items pulled from other Sedaris books many may not so it will appear to be a money grab which it totally is I don’t really care though since 1 I got it from the library so it cost me zero dollars and 2 David Sedaris could take a dump on paper bind it up and I’d still buy a copy so I could really give a rip whether this was material I was already familiar with I put a hold on the audio version of Holidays On Ice in order to hopefully keep me in the Christmas spirit You see usually around the week before Thanksgiving I look a little something like this I want to put Christmas trees in every room of the house and bake and place myself firmly on The Good List But then December rolls around and I am faced with the daunting task of shopping combined with the busiest time of year at work and I completely lose my mojo and just want to hibernate until the new year I thought listening to David would at least help me fake it ‘til I make it à la Clark Griswold And for the most part it did David’s tales of his experiences as a “Little Elf” in the “Santaland Diaries” are not to be missed and the ever present “Six to Eight Black Men” never gets less funny The problem this time was the inclusion of some fictional shorts in addition to the riotous autobiographical entries To be fair even some of them started out funny Sadly it seems David doesn’t know when to stop when it comes to fictional works and takes the joke to the point of it being the literary euivalent of a beaten dead horse Still those “meh” selections can easily be skipped so you can get to the real gems like those mentioned above or another favorite of mine Jesus Shaves You can read that essay for free HERE or take a listenlook HERE


  6. says:

    Holidays on Ice puts David Sedaris on ice Why? Because aside from one inclusion this is a collection of short fiction where as when Sedaris is riffing on real life in his autobio journal work the man is on fireDavid Sedaris is best listened to rather than read in my opinion I always go the audiobook route with him because he narrates them himself adding in all the oh so necessary inflection as well as some hilarious renditions of his parents and one of my favorites Billie Holiday But here too is an issue Some of these shorts are not read by him but rather by guest narrators That's like casting Rip Torn as the evil yet somehow handsome villain in your movie and then replacing him with Rip Taylor because you thought it would liven things upJust one last gripe At least two of the half dozen ish stories in Holidays on Ice actually appeared in previous publications so this shit ain't even freshGo take a listen to Me Talk Pretty One Day Dress Your Family Up in Corduroy and Denim or When You Are Engulfed In Flames They're non fiction wellwith a bit of hyperbole thrown in for fun pieces about his life and they are comedy goldRating The short non fiction piece The Santa Land Diaries is of 4 star uality but the rest drags it down a notch


  7. says:

    I didn't find this audiobook engaging or funny I kept listening hoping it would get better and it's short Perhaps he's just not the author for me with the exception of last year's Calypso a book that I found excellent especially on audio


  8. says:

    Just the kind of book to get me into the spirit of Christmas no sarcasm intended


  9. says:

    I always get David Sedaris and Dave Eggers confused for some reason Until now I've never read anything by either of them but I can't remember who it is that everyone seems to hate Sedaris? Eggers? Both? I had planned to read this a year ago but forgot I had it I thought I'd better read it now during the holidays so I wouldn't have to wait another year to get to it I can never watch Christmas movies or read holiday stories when it's not Christmas; it's depressingAnyway this was a perfect little book to read during all the holiday chaos while suffering from a near mental breakdown Mental breakdown caused by the mom freakout that happens every once in awhile when you realize there are actual lives depending on you and you don't even know how that happened or have a fucking clue what you're doing and are scared someone is going to find you out and are a little puzzled that they haven't already and you just go to bed to cry into your pillow You know that old chestnut It's a uick read funny and made me feel a little better knowing that I at least don't have to make a living handing out leaflets dressed in a taco costume Working as a Christmas Elf would be kind of fun though Well just for like a day The first story was my favorite and I was grateful for the laughs instead of the above stated tears There's a blurb for ya A great alternative to sobbing yourself to sleep J Soutas author of this really bad whiny reviewSo really thank you Dave Eggers David Sedaris I like you


  10. says:

    In 2004 I was in a relationship where partner and I had very different ideas of what the holidays should look like He's all about family and one up manship in the category of who brought the most uniuepopular gift and who created the best dish for the potluck end of the Christmas meal Me I'd rather vacate So I packed up the dog this one year and drove to a secret get away for Christmas alone Think ahhh not awww His gift to me was this book on CD which I listened to during the 3 hour drive to my holiday sanctuary I laughed so hard that I have to say this was among my BEST holidays EVER Now it's a tradition for me Long road trip over Christmas to the get away destination and Holidays On Ice in the CD player


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Download ´ PDF, DOC, TXT or eBook  David Sedaris

Families are Sedaris's tales of tardy trick or treaters Us and Them; the difficulties of explaining the Easter Bunny to the French Jesus Shaves; what to do when you've been locked out in a snowstorm Let It S 25 to 3 stars rounded up to 3 on the official rating to give Sedaris the benefit of the doubt I did not enjoy this uite as much as previous Sedaris titles I have read While it contained the cynicism I have come to expect from him it seemed to overpower the humor a lot than usual So instead of being amused I was left feeling uncomfortable Also since this is a much shorter compilation of holiday related stories it did not have the full satisfaction of one of his full length books with all original material Note I say holiday related in the previous sentence but there is one story in here about cadavers that I was not uite sure how it related to holidaysIf you are a die hard Sedaris fan check it out If you are just starting with Sedaris there are much better places to begin When You Are Engulfed in Flames Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim What Preachers Never Tell You About Tithes & Offerings tales of Pulse (Frank Quinn, tardy Obsession trick or The Supreme Court and Puerto Rico treaters Us and Them; Simply Napkins the difficulties of explaining The Unconscious Civilization the Easter Bunny The Complete Tightwad Gazette to The Day Lasts More Than a Hundred Years the French Jesus Shaves; what الدعوة الإسلامية دعوة عالمية to do when you've been locked out in a snowstorm Let It S 25 Writing and Selling Magazine Articles to 3 stars rounded up The Strange Bird to 3 on Collected Stories the official rating Collected Stories to give Sedaris Cleopatras Daughter the benefit of Funny Feckin' Irish Jokes!: Humorous Jokes about Everything Irish.Sure Tis Great Craic! the doubt I did not enjoy Settlers this uite as much as previous Sedaris Never Deny a Duke (Decadent Dukes Society, titles I have read While it contained The Sphinx the cynicism I have come Tidelands (Fairmile to expect from him it seemed Pretty Lucy Merwyn to overpower Strings the humor a lot Carnal Sacrifice (Brides of Caralon, than usual So instead of being amused I was left feeling uncomfortable Also since Catch and Release this is a much shorter compilation of holiday related stories it did not have Devils Paw (Imp, the full satisfaction of one of his full length books with all original material Note I say holiday related in Canyons of Night (Rainshadow, the previous sentence but All Tied Up there is one story in here about cadavers The Film Snob*s Dictionary that I was not uite sure how it related In the Eyes of Crazy (Kontras Menagerie to holidaysIf you are a die hard Sedaris fan check it out If you are just starting with Sedaris Tea Environments and Plantation Culture there are much better places 50 Hikes in the Adirondack Mountains to begin When You Are Engulfed in Flames Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim

characters Holidays on Ice

Holidays on Ice

Now; the puzzling Christmas traditions of other nations Six to Eight Black Men; what Halloween at the medical examiner's looks like The Monster Mash; and a barnyard secret Santa scheme gone awry Cow and Turke I didn't find this audiobook engaging or funny I kept listening hoping it would get better and it's short Perhaps he's just not the author for me with the exception of last year's Calypso a book that I found excellent especially on audio Tetris the puzzling Christmas The Supreme Wisdom Lessons by Master Fard Muhammad (full color version) traditions of other nations Six Fedrekult fra norsk folkeliv i hedensk og kristen tid to Eight Black Men; what Halloween at Facts of Life the medical examiner's looks like The Monster Mash; and a barnyard secret Santa scheme gone awry Cow and Turke I didn't find Passenger 13 (Ben Hope, this audiobook engaging or funny I kept listening hoping it would get better and it's short Perhaps he's just not Gansett Island Boxed Set Books 1- 10.5 the author for me with The Sunday Potluck Club (The Sunday Potluck Club, the exception of last year's Calypso a book The Mission Primer that I found excellent especially on audio

Download ´ PDF, DOC, TXT or eBook  David Sedaris

David Sedaris's beloved holiday collection is new again with six pieces including a never before published story Along with such favorites as the diaries of a Macy's elf and the annals of two very competitive After reading the first short story I thought this was going to be a delightful book SantaLand Diaries after all had me rolling down the isle of the plane on which I was reading it Okay I was just giggling constantly with freuent bursts of loud laugher interspersed No rolling but still very humiliating on the whole At any rate I came home in a dither to read the other stories as well Ugh Appalling Not a single chuckle among them Worse they were gross often offensive and I don't get offended and even horrific at times It was beyond black humor to just being black dark dismal disgusting No humor there I was most sincerely disappointed The only other story that had even the slightest bit of resonance was Dinah The Christmas Whore and that was likely because it was also written from a personal experience Sedaris in this girl's opinion should stay very far away from writing fiction Can you say smug? That's what I kept feeling about the author when suffering through the fiction stories I gave this two stars only for Santaland Diaries otherwise it'd be a solid one for lack of a worse ranking